Déjà vu
by Arexu
Summary: Years make people wiser. Having spent quite a lot of time meditating on the subject of love and duty, Terry concluded that the only duty of a man was to protect and make happy the woman he loved.
1. Chapter 1

**Déjà vu**

**_A/N:_** This is my first writing experience. _What an_ _unexpected way to begin an authors note, huh?_

In fact,I wrote the fic ages ago and posted on a certain wonderful forum well known among Candy fans. Apparently, re-reading this after such a time gap I would't say I am even nearly satisfied with my creation. But since I have nothing better to offer the CC world, please, bear with it. Oh yes, I _am_ a modest person. And actually, the story is not so severely bad either. It has undergone some changes especially the final chapter since the initial publishing.

The fic is based on the manga and anime as well, but there are just a couple of references to their content which are insignificant to the complex understanding of the fic.

**_Disclaimer:_**_ I do not own Candy Candy and the characters. The ownership issue was resolved without my parttaking; I guess now it's final whom Candy Candy legally belongs to. If you have been seeking for someone to blame and make responsible for your childhood trauma it's definitely not me._

**Chapter 1: Reaching for the dream**

A briskly rattle of train wheels, tiny villages, woods and fields flashing by, the feeling of nervous expectation and awakening impatience, everything seemed to confirm that he was finally nearing the welcome moment when his dream would come true. He could barely sit on his place, his look swiftly moved from his watch to the window and back to his watch, passing this track over and over again. Every two minutes he rose from his seat, leant his head close to the window pane and peered forward trying to go ahead the train with his gaze. He knew that only a couple of minutes, no, just a few seconds more, and the place that was the key to his dream would appear on the horizon. The train from New York was approaching Chicago. Terence Graham Grandchester was finally going to make his dream come true.

Opposite him Eleanor Baker watched her sons impatient movements with the corner of her eye, smiling inwardly. She pretended no to notice Terrys agitation and seemed to be reading the script of a new play she was going to play in, but being a loving mother she couldnt help sharing her sons excitement. Moreover, at this very moment Terry, who had been so reserved for a certain period of his life, represented quite an interesting sight.

A voice from the loud-speaker solemnly announced that in ten minutes the train would arrive in Chicago. Terry jumped up from his seat and was about to pick up his suitcase it had already been taken off from the shelf by Terry an hour ago when his mother reached for his hand and invited him to resume his seat with a slight gesture.

"Calm down, Terry. I bet you have been carried away by your emotions and missed the in ten minutes part of the announcement."

"Have I? I just can't put up with the idea of spending my time doing nothing but staring out of the window stupidly and waiting."

"... and doing clockwatching", _Eleanor Baker put away the script and looked up_. "Honey, I understand now that all your ways are clear you cant sit on your hands. Just try not to rush things. There are only several minutes. Not months, not years, Terry!"

"Right, not years..."

How many years has it actually been? Six? Seven? A round dozen maybe? They appeared like a hundred to him, though he was perfectly aware of the number of years, month and days he had been deprived of her. Three years and a half had lasted his personal hell, it took him three years and a half to find the courage to take control over his fate. The events of the last two days seemed to be so far away now.

* * *

He was going to propose to Susanna. He _was supposed_ to do it to be more specific. At first in private and then at the official dinner that Mrs. Marlow had appointed on the same afternoon in advance. Such a haste wasn't surprising at all. The only thing that might have looked strange was the fact that Terry was the last person informed about it. Apparently, Mrs. Marlow believed he wouldn't be able to postpone his proposal for the third time and he would give in under her pressure upon his wounded guilt and duty feeling. He could as well have got accustomed to being manipulated and told what to do at Marlows place. However, it was the last straw. Every day he woke up with the realization that he had to live in regrets and sorrow for the rest of his days, with his desperate need to see _Her_, to feel _Her_ and to be with _Her_ and only _Her_ getting stronger and nearly unbearable. As a result, having spent quite a lot of time meditating on the subject of love and duty Terry concluded that the only duty of a man was to protect and make happy the woman he loved.

So it occurred to Terry that hed been enough the puppet of the Marlows. He didn't argue with the over-protective mother. But as he entered the room of his soon-believed-to-be bride he had no intention of connecting his life with her any longer. Oh, what a scene full of tears and pleadings broke out in the house! One couldn't have though of better food for scandal-starving reporters. Susanna's tears and pleadings very soon were dampened down by torrents of swears and threats from Mrs. Marlows part. Much to Terry's relief this time he had his reinforcement with him. While Mrs. Marlow was having a purely lady talk with Eleanor Baker, Susanna took charge of setting the mass opinion on the right track. A few moments later her soapy remarks persuaded the whole reception room of Terence G. Grandchester being the most heartless and irresponsible monster. On seeing his supposed bride's enthusiasm all Terrys doubts about her tendency to suicides vanished at once. She had evidently become livelier after replacing her wheelchair with prosthesis. The tension in the house was too strong and Terry left this place once and for all as soon as he managed to make his way to the exit.

Later he received a letter from Susanna which read that she actually was sorry for and ashamed of having made the scene and most of all she was sorry that they had ended up like this. She confessed to him that after thinking things over that evening she realized that maybe to let him go wasn't an infinite disaster. She loved him, but at least she realized that her life couldnt base upon the unshared love any longer. She had understood it quite a long ago but had no courage to make the first step to freedom, hers and his. It looked like they both had needed something to trigger their break up, and strange as it might seem it turned out to be their engagement party.

* * *

"What exactly are you going to do now, Terry?" Eleanor's question brought Terry back to reality.

"I'm going to visit the clinic where she worked during my last visit in Chicago. After that if I don't meet her or learn where she is, I'll go to the flat to where I used to write letters. I'll go to the Pony Hill, the Andrews mansion, to the ends of the earth after all! Wherever she is I'll find her. I'll find my Lady Freckles and take her back."

The fervent answer pleased the young mans mother to no end. Her son was back. Once again he was back thanks to the freckled lively girl, who was truly the savior of her family. Eleanor Baker secretly wished she could accompany Terry and with her own eyes witness his son's reunion with the love of his life. No, it was impossible. Not only because she was in Chicago on business and had to perform today, but from considerations that two young human beings in love would need some privacy after being separated for several years.

It was natural that one part of her, the most motherish one, didn't want to let him go alone and was afraid that her child could make a mistake, stumble somewhere, need her advice No, Terry wasn't a child any more. Eleanor Baker saw a man ready to overcome every obstacle on his way and challenge the destiny.

"Whats up, mom? Are we getting off? Weve arrived already. I see you don't have to hurry anywhere, but I beg you, have sympathy with me!"

"I'm sorry honey. Right, we have more important things to do. Let's go."

While getting off Terry could tell for sure he was carried by some intangible force as if the emotions that overwhelmed him burst forth, interflowed and materialized into wings.

_Wings?__ Who though up this nonsense? _Terry gave a half smile_. Is it what they call the Wings of Love? Sounds sappy. But I guess I have to agree with it._


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Steps on broken glass**

It was a relief that Terry didn't have to go to the end of the earth for Candy. After sending the cases to the hotel and exchanging good byes and good lucks with his mother he started his searches sticking to the plan he had shared with Eleanor Baker in the train. Finally, he had the Andrew mansion in front of him where according to Dr. Martins report Candy had been living for a year.

Obviously, a reception or party took place in the house this day because a number of cars had been parked at the mansion and servant people were running to and fro, giving each other errands and yelling their lungs out. For a second Terry thought that he would have problems getting into the house without invitation. Yet hardly had he introduced himself at the main entrance as he was politely showed in. Apparently, the manservant believed that such a Broadway celebrity like Terence G. Grandchester just had to be among the guests of the most respected house in Chicago.

Terry tried to stay in shadow and not stand out among the guest. Admiring screams by obsessed fan ladies were the last thing he wanted to deal with this evening. In fact, his precautions were not necessary. The public consisted mostly of elder gentlemen and ladies, whose attention was drawn to a monotonous speech of some woman. Terry followed the stares of the crowd and caught sight of an old woman of grant - in all means of the word - appearance. _"The Great Aunt_", dawned upon him as he compared Candys descriptions with their incarnation several feet away from him. To all appearance, the party was given in the Aunts honor, since everybody was affectedly eager to congratulate her. Terrys gaze moved around to discover Albert, the Dandy with his shy girlfriend on one side and the devilish dou Neil and Eliza on the other side of the Aunt. He had no reason to be surprised at seeing them here_,_ but his heart skipped a beat on seeing all those familiar faces. Their presence was a sign that Candy, his beloved Freckles, must have been here too. Where could she be if not with the gang by the way?

Terry remembered Candy had told him something of being on rather bad terms with her Aunt and his eyes continued inspecting the reception room. On a spot in the darkest corner of the room his gaze stood still, his heart jumped up, his breathing stopped. There she was, so beautifully alone, standing modestly in shadow, her hands down and clasped together, with a meditative expression on her face and mysterious glitter in her eyes, nearly smiling. As if a muse, invisible for the eyes of average men, honored with her presence this noisy gathering of people. And only he, the uninvited guest was able to see her. Was she another vision like the one he had had in Rockton? No, this time he saw the real Freckles and his intentions were most real as well. Terry took a deep breath and made a step. His first step in his new life. He felt his heart beating faster and faster with every inch he passed. She didn't notice him. How will she react? Therere just a few more steps left

"Candice White Andrew!"

Finally the sounds from the external world reached Terrys ears. And they sounded very much like Alberts voice. _"Why is everybody clapping hands?_" The crowd parted forming a pass direct from the place where were the Aunt and the gang to Candy. _"What the heck is happening here?_" Unfortunately Terry failed to get the answer by means of visual perception, because the moving crowd unmercifully pressed the great Broadway actor to the wall and from his observation post he could only observe indifferent backs of Chicagos elite.

Since Terrys eyes were of no more help now he was all ears. He didn't actually have to strain his attention. What followed next he would have heard with plugs in his ears. As much as Terry wished, he had failed to forget this piercing voice. Eliza.

"I wont have this stable girl as my relative! My patience is out! Either me or she! CHOOSE!"

Much to Terry's disappointment he wasn't able to hear what verdict was announced, but obviously things stood not for Elizas benefit as her voice resounded again louder and more hysterical than before.

"You are going to regret it! You don't know what Eliza Reagan is capable of!" Terry heard the sound of footsteps. "Come on, Neil! We have nothing to do with this bunch of people!" Footsteps again and a resonant door bang.

Terry took advantage of the confusion among the guests to get closer to the center of action. However a strong voice that sounded again very much like Albert's voice asked the crowd for silence. The man speaking must have had considerable power in this house for everyone obeyed at once. Finally Terry found a good place from where he could see the whole room. He was astonished to see that the speaker was Albert indeed. _"Albert in tuxedo?"_

Terry didn't have a chance to give way to this thought. At once he was seized with alarm and sudden anger and the reason for it was none other Albert who impudently placed his arm around Candys waste.

"As I was saying and what I repeat with delight, charming Candice White Andrew has agreed to be my fiancée. I will never be able to thank you enough for it, my love." Albert kissed slightly his fiancée. "I would like to thank also my dear Aunt who kindly gave us her permission to announce officially our engagement on her birthday party."

Somewhere in the middle of Albert's speech Terry's mind freezed refusing to accept further information. He didn't hear that Albert called Elroy his Aunt, that he was grateful to her for kindly giving them her permission, Terry didn't hear how Candy thanked her fiancé and the Aunt. He didn't hear toasts and speeches of guests from which he could have concluded that Albert was the Great Uncle William, the head of the Andrews, that the Aunt had cardinally changed her attitude towards Candice, that Alistear Cornwell had tragically died in the War and that his brother Archibald and Annie Brighton had been happily married for a year. Even the rumors that Neil and Eliza had fallen into the Aunts disgrace didn't reach Terry. He stood in the same corner where Candy had been a few minutes ago, devastated and all alone in the shadow that his life had cast on him.

_"Pull yourself together! Engagement isnt a life imprisonment, you saw it yourself._" Having convinced himself that Candy had taken this decisive step just because she had no choice and sympathized with Albert, Terry almost decided to stick to his scheme, had not a very meaningful scene caught his eye.

They were dancing. His Freckles and that Albert. The latter leaned over Candys ear and was whispering something. He has such a passionate look that Terry though he was going to roast Candy. But that was half the trouble. Candy didn't seem to feel the least uneasiness in this hot company. She was giggling and looked rather pleased. Of course these details might have been an optical illusion The worst came in the end of the dance. Albert shamelessly covered Candys lips with his and it appeared to Terry that the kiss lasted at least as long as the famous reminiscence from the Scotland summer. With the only difference: The slap, that Terry would so much welcome now, never followed.

Now it was really over. The weak gleams of hope that Terry had managed to save after Alberts speech suddenly died out. Terrys dreams that had been so fresh and alive just an hour ago were shattered at once. As for the pain the latest events caused to him, Terry wondered how he still hadn't fainted from a pain shock. The old wounds opened again. Three years ago he had thought he would never be able to feel again, neither joy nor pain. Hed been mistaken. Hed managed to rise from the dead. What for? To die for the second time?

"Terry. Is it really you?" A low soft voice called him. Oh, this voice! Only this voice could make him shudder by just calling his name. "What a surprise to see you here!" The freckled face in front of his eyes broke into a wide smile.

"Hello Candy. How are you?"

"I'm fine! Oh, Terry I missed you so much!" Candy threw herself joyful around Terrys neck. He hugged her slightly and let go. Though he wanted desperately to hold her in his arms! Yet his sad experience told him that it would change nothing. Why tempt fate?

"I've heard you are the most famous actor of the whole Broadway! I'm so happy for you!" The smile on the beloved face became wider. "What are you doing here?"

A very good question. What was he doing here? He should have left this place with no honor straight after his fiasco just like Eliza had done not long ago. Well, as hed been so careless to stay here he could do nothing but play his part. The part of a _friend_ whod paid a visit to a childhood _friend_ and who was very _happy_ for the latter and for himself as well. Wasnt acting the only thing that hed been doing for years? Its his work after all. And he never neglected his work. It would be his best part.

"I am here to keep company to my mother. She has some acting business to do here and since the director gave me a few days I decided to go with her. With our rehearsals, performances and tours we can never find time to meet in New York." Terry thought the beginning was very good. "And certainly how can I forget that I have a good friend here in Chicago?"

"Thank you Terry. I'm very glad to see you."

"Same for me Freckles." Somehow he was able to tell all this smiling and looking very much at ease. He wasn't called the best Broadway actor for nothing. "I think arrived just in time. Congratulations on your engagement!" Saying it Terry was glad Albert wasnt around. The guy always had seen him through, controlling oneself would be more difficult now that Terry felt like strangling him.

"Thank you. I suppose you have figured out that Albert turned out to be the Great Uncle William." _Oh was he? _Well judging by the way Albert behaved, so pompous and impudent, Terry suspected that he was something _Great _in this house. "But this isn't everything. Can you imagine my surprise when I learned that he was my Prince of the Hill?"

_He was her WHO? Prince?_ It was the hit below the belt. No wonder she ended up with Albert, her Prince, her savior, her shoulder to cry on. Who cares actually? Now matter who this Albert was there were no place for Terry in Candys life anymore.

"Really? I'm glad for you two." _Damn. __Did he have nothing better to say to the great occasion?__ He hoped it sounded convincing enough._

"Yes, Albert is a wonderful person. And how is Susanna, Terry?"

Terry looked intently at Candy. Was she only pretending or did she really have merely friendly feelings for him now? He used to read everything on her face but what was going on in her obviously was out of reach to him now. How could she be so calm? What had happened to their love? Shed never been a good actress before before that day Was it the fact that he had let her go so easily that nipped in the bud the chance to start it all over again?

"She feels perfectly well. She parted with her wheelchair two year ago. She can walk now, almost as skilfully as she used to before the accident. The doctor has allowed her to act again and she is going back on stage. I think she finally got back her joy of life." _At least he didn't lie about Susanna. She was fine, a way finer than Terry._

"Oh it's a miracle! I'm happy everything is fine with you two." Candy smiled again. Damn his widely praised acting skills if he couldnt make out whether it was a real smile or a fake one.

"Candy! Candy can I have you for a minute please!" Missis Dandy called her friend from the other side of the room. Apparently nobody except Candy noticed Terry. Not that he wished for it. Though Albert must have seen him after the dance.

"Sorry, Annie's calling. Do you want to come with me? I'm sure that everyone will be glad to see you." _Well he wasn't sure if he would actually be glad to see everyone. Albert in particular._

"Thank you, but I'd better stay here. I see a lot of young females around your Dandy friend. Believe me, they are the most dangerous creatures when youre a celebrity like me."

Terry winked at Candy and made the best I-am-fine-here smile. She turned around and went away. He was smiling and appeared to be a mischievous boy like he used to be in her company. But why did he feel like reaching out for her and holding her tight against him?

_Stepping on broken glass,_

_On the fragments of broken hearts,_

_Stepping on broken glass_

_On this one-way road._

_Stepping on broken glass_

_Following the happiness I lost,_

_Stepping on broken glass_

_On the road that doesnt exist._

Song translation from Russian

* * *

Terry was on the terrace carried away by his cheerless thoughts when he heard somebody approaching him.

"I hope you dont mind the company of an old friend." Albert stopped near Terry and leaned on the railing.

"Of course not." Terry felt that Albert hadnt come only to say hi. "I knew you couldn't just neglect an uninvited guest like me."

"That simplifies everything. Let's get down to cases. Why are you here?"

"You think you are the only one whos asking this question?" Terry smirked sadly.

"It's not the best time for jokes Terry." Albert shook his head.

"Why not? Jokes and big occasions like engagement parties go perfectly well together. By the by, my congratulations!" Terry noticed that Albert could be extremely annoying especially with Candy being his fiancée.

"You might fool Candy but your tricks don't work on me. I've seen and heard you two. Great acting! If I didn't know you I wouldve believed in your fairy tale about calling upon a childhood friend."

"What do you want?"

"I want to talk Terry."

"What for Albert? To tell me to go back to New York and go on with my life? Well I'll save you the trouble! I'm taking the first train tomorrow morning. I'm not going the slippery slope again if that's what youre afraid of! Satisfied?"

"Terry you are angry. You are angry at me, because I have something that you couldnt keep. You are angry at Candy, because she displays purely friendly feelings towards you. What's worse you are angry at yourself, because you think you are the one to be to blame for everything and you are so lost that you can not make out where the truth is. If you need to let off steam so I'm here. Come on, punch me, strangle me, do everything you wanted to do with me when you saw us together."

Terry gave Albert a sidelong glance.

"No thanks. I'm kind of too old for those punching games." He paused. "You summed it up quite well. Except one thing. I think I know the truth."

"You think she doesn't love you? Let me correct it. You think shed been over you too easily? Listen, Terry. I am not going to tell you how I fell in love with her but Ill tell you that gaining her love wasn't easy. I'm the only person who knows how many nights she had been crying her eyes out, crying over you Terry! Only I can tell how long it took her to finally be able to hear your name without shuddering and getting deep in thoughts. No one else knows that half a year ago the evening I proposed to her she left the house and didn't go for her night shift in the hospital but walked all night long alone in the streets. She came back with swollen eyes and spent a week in bed with fever. It took her more that five month to say yes. She has been struggling so hard to move on. You see, Terry, after three years were having the same talk."

They stood still for a while. They had both known that this talk wouldn't change much so why they were having the same conversation again?

"Albert you know, this time I was seriously intended to take her back. I thought finally settling my affairs in New York would make my dream come true. I admit, I hadn't taken you into account. Stupid of me. Maybe that's your patience why she fell for you." Terry turned around and made for the reception room.

"This may be not a very pleasent thing to say and hear but... You'd better leave Terry. Not because of me, because of Candy. She must feel very uncomfortable appearing with her fiancé in front of the guy who used to play the same part in her life."

"You could have spared your lines, Albert. One time was enough for me to learn them by heart." Terry answered without turning back to face Albert.

* * *

"You are leaving? So soon? But why?" Candy looked very upset and this time Terry could tell the disappointment was not in any way fake.

"I promised to take my mother from her performance. It's time for me to go. I was happy to see you, Candy. Really happy. And you too, Albert."

"I'll show you to the gate!" Said Candy in a desperate attempt to make Terry stay for a bit longer.

"Thanks but don't trouble yourself. I know the way. Besides your friends are looking for you again." Which was true. Annie and Archie were currently inspecting the opposite side of the room.

"He is right honey. You are in the focus of everyones attention today. The people are rather tired of congratulating the Great Aunt Elroy, now it's our turn." Terry had to admit that Albert had done his best no to display his physical closeness to Candy from the moment he had noticed him.

"Good bye Candy. Thank you for the evening, our meeting means a lot for me."

"Same for me Terry. Good bye. Don't forget to say hi to your mother from me." Candy gifted Terry with a sweet smile, shook hands with him and left. Terry was about to say something like _I'll write you from New York_ but checked himself. He hadn't written her last time. Had anything changed since then?

After saying goodbye to Albert on the doorway Terry cast the last glance at Candy. It was the glance with which he had always wanted too look at her since his arrival but couldn't allow himself. It was the look of a man over head and ears in love. A farewell look.

* * *

He carried their two suitcases in the compartment that Eleanor Baker had reserved in advance last evening. News spreads quickly. Terry was having his talk with Albert when his mother learned about the engagement and it hadn't taken her a lot of efforts to draw up a new plan of actions. She would have preferred to stick to the initial version of it, so did Terry. But that was how things stood. Terrys mother took for him a separate compartment so that she could any moment go to the day coach if her son needed privacy.

Terry didn't stay in the compartment with his mother and went to the carriage door. Now he was leaving Chicago again, but what a smashing difference there was comparing to the last time. And Candy, she must have taken the same train when was going to him. Had she felt the same when she was leaving New-York? Had he made all the way to Chicago again just to revive the bunch of painful memories? To feel himself on the top and then crash down to the bottom again? Life played coarse jokes on him. No, he wasnt an actor; he was a puppet, a life-term prisoner sentenced to serve his time because once he had given his love to duty. He had no duty now; there was nothing to live for either.

The morning train from Chicago to New York was leaving the station. Terence Graham Grandchester was already back in his personal hell.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: It is all in our hands**

"Faster! Can it go faster?!"

A high tense voice and a buzzing sound of a car engine disturbed the silence of the morning. If a random early riser had looked out of the window at that moment he could have caught a glimps of a young lady with long golden hair and perky freckles on her nose. The first sunbeams were already reaching the girls face, that held an anxious yet determined expression. As of the car driver, it was the head of the Andrew family in person.

Could she catch up with him? Wasnt it too late? No, she shouldn't think this way. It was the only right thing she had to do now. Goodness, how tired she was of running away! The only way she must go now was the way to Terry, the one she had never stopped loving and dreamt to spend all her life with. There was nothing that could have changed her mind, not even the word she had once given to the man beside her.

Candy looked with a corner of her eye at Albert. His face expressed absolutely nothing but the concentration for he was going out of his way to deliver her in time to the train station. She couldn't tell whether he was angry or desperate but she could feel gratitude and admiration coming from the bottom of her heart. That was the way she had always felt about him, all this time hed been to her like a big brother, so almighty and always there to support her. And even now that she was leaving everything and was about to leave him he was there to help her to her lucky train.

* * *

This night Candy didn't have a wink of sleep. Memories about Terry wouldn't leave her in peace. She thought she had finally made a step forward in a new life the life without Terry but Terrys sudden visit made her realize that not many things had changed since she saw him last time. Love and pain were still there, burning her inside and erupting out from her.

She hadn't lied to Terry: She had been happy to see him. As happy as one could be on discovering someone one hadnt seen for years but loved for ages in good health and spirit. But she remembered the promise they had made on that crucial snowy day. _Plus _the promise she had given to Albert.

Terry seemed to be carrying out his promise brilliantly. So much at ease and happy he was at the party. He had moved on with Susanna and was able to look Candy calmly at the face and see a friend. How different from her! She, while looking at him, was still seeing the face of the man she loved so much that it pained. But she couldnt allow to give herself away. It took her everything to get a grip of herself that evening. In fact she should have been very pleased with her self-composure since she had coped with the mission flawlessly. But she was incapable of any positive emotions this night.

Then early in the morning Candy came upon an evening. The gossip column presenting a sensational and, strange as it might seem, unquestionably _truthful_ interview with Susanna Marlow opened Candys eyes to the real reason for Terrys coming to Chicago. It was then when she realized she had been not the only person who must have failed to get to sleep that night.

Everything was clear to Candy at once. Why Terry had turned up in her house after staying away from her for years, why hed seemed to be so light-hearted, why hed left so soon And his talk with Albert! Now it was clear why from afar it hadn't given an impression of being friendly. That was it! Albert! She had to go to him.

As expected, Candy had to disturb the family heads sleep in such an early hour. Albert looked Candy up and down and then shot a look at the headline in the newspaper. His heart sank in apprehension. He could hear his inner voice striking a sentence _"There now, William! It is over for you_." Having his eyes glued on Candys Albert got up, approached her, took gently her hands in his and brought his face so close to her that only a breath distance separated their lips. The kiss was unavoidable. However the devastating thought that Candy didnt belong to him pulled Albert back. He slowly took off the ring from her fourth finger, squeezed it in his hand and closing his eyes kissed his fist.

"I am sorry Albert. I can't marry you. I want to follow my heart desire. And my heart belongs to Terry. I'm really sor..." Candy didn't have time to finish her long speech as Albert covered her mouth with his hand.

"Hush, little one. No need to explain anything. Hurry up and put yourself in order. I'll be waiting for you at the entrance in 5 minutes. The morning train to New York leaves in no time." He had said goodbye to his fiancée. Now he had to help his foster daughter.

* * *

When the whistle blew notifying that the train was taking off, the most unfortunate passenger left his meditation point at the door and went back to his compartment. Eleanor Baker met her son's eye and got up.

"I'll fetch a glass of water."

"Mom" Eleanor turned her head surprisingly. She hadn't expected Terry to talk. "Thank you for leaving your business and going with me." A lame smile appeared on Terrys face.

"It goes without saying honey." The mother forced a smile. Her sons pain was reflecting in her eyes. The best thing she could do now was stay with him. "I'll be back very soon."

As soon as Eleanors back hid around the corner Terry leaned back in his sit and closed his eyes. Oh Lord how he was tired, not only physically! Tired of thinking, tired of hoping, tired of struggling, tired of losing. The only thing he wished was to fall into a deep sleep not wake up for days. Maybe in his dreams at least he could be happy.

Much to his annoyance, a strange noise in the passage didn't let his wish come true. The noise was coming nearer. Sounded like very quick footsteps. It was not far away, two compartments away, perhaps. A door slamming. A scream and then silence. Footsteps again, this time mixed up with the sound of two men speaking.

"Now explain clearly what happened!"

"Some crazy girl jumped in the last carriage on the run."

"A free-rider again? Wheres she?"

"Dunno. Slipped in the next carriage, I guess. Let's check there."

The conductors went by to the next carriage.

_"It's the whole world thats crazy", _Terry murmured and closed his eyes again trying to pay no attention to the renewed sound effects emerging from the same compartment.

Suddenly a painfully familiar fragrance made him open his eyes. He saw his lady Freckles standing in the doorway, with tousled hair and healthy colour on her face. _"Lucky man I am",_ he thought sarcastically. Despite his wretched mential state he had still managed to fall asleep and now was having the dream he had so much desired to see.

Wait. Could you smell and feel your heart beating so loud in a dream?

Candy stepped in. She was smiling as bright as never before.

"Here I am Terry."

Terry rose from his place. Slightly, almost shyly he brought his trembling hand to her face and with a hardly perceptible touch stroked her cheek and chin, not believing his eyes and barely trusting his hand. Then with an abrupt movement he withdrew his palm from her face still afraid that she could thaw like a snowflake. But then _what a bliss!_ - his fingertips where again in contact with her burning skin. He felt Candys tiny palm cover his other hand he had the courage to press it back against her cheek. This gesture of her gave him courage to let his free hand explore her luxuriant hair and feel its lightness with his fingers.

"Candy, tell me its not a dream. Tell me youre real."

"Of course I am real Terry! If I were not I wouldn't have been hiding myself from the conductors." She laughed interlacing her left hand fingers with his.

"Sounds logical. But why..? I mean how are you..? Oh my God that was you who hopped in the last carriage!" Gradually Terry began to grasp the thread of events. His Freckles had been chasing him, shed jumped in the leaving train to see him. Now she really was here, wasnt she. He could feel her, she was here. But why? It made not sense. _"Why?_" Terry didn't notice how he said the last question aloud.

Candy giggled. It was the first time within her memory when Terry was so charmingly confused. She couldn't help staying silent for an instant to peer at his perfect features. Finding herself in his blue eyes she opened her mouth to give an answer.

"There she is!" The cry made Candy and Terry shudder at surprise and drop their hands. The two conductors were piercing Candy with their eyes. "Hide and seek is over, Miss! Now ahead with your ticket or well chuck you out of the train!"

Candy and Terry were not prepared for this turn of events still floating somewhere between enjoying the beauty of their closeness. No wonder they couldn't utter a word. Next moment they would have found themselves again apart from each other if Eleanor Baker hadnt come for Candys rescue.

"Gentlemen, the young lady here you have been talking so rude to would be none other than Miss Candice White Andrew. For your information she is traveling together with Terrence G. Grandchester whom you should have recognized as well." Eleanor Baker said in a serious resentful tone, though she was filled with joy seeing Candy by Terrys side.

Terry understood what his mother was driving at and exposed his mothers 1. Class ticket. Miss Baker is right. The lady is with me. As of her strange way of getting on the train, anyone can happen to be a few minutes late at a train station.

The men presented their sincere apologies and, blushing furiously, left. Eleanor Baker winked meaningfully at Terry, gave Candy an approving smile and made her way to the day coach.

As soon as Candy and Terry were left to their own devices again Terry burst out laughing.

"That's the Freckled Tarzan I know! Jumpinmg in a moving train without a ticket! You've rocked up the whole train personnel."

"Stop laughing Terry! What else did I have to do? I didn't want to let you go away without me." Candy pouted with a note of offence in her voice.

Terry couldn't believe what he was hearing. After he thought he had lost any hope of ever seeing her again she was here with him. He didn't dare to allow the thought os of her running after him to _to come back to him?_ Yet no other explanation occurred to him. Anyway, it was his chance. He had been so blind to overlook the straws the fate had been offering to him; he would no way miss it one more time. It was now or never.

"Candy I don't know why you are here. Or better to say I don't dare to give way to my conjectures, though with all my bleeding heart I wish they were true. But no matter what your intentions are..." Candy was about to cut him short but he stopped her with a pleading gesture and went on in a steady voice. "... now matter what really happened yesterday and all those years we have been away from each other theres something I can't keep to myself any longer. It is stronger than me, it is tearing my soul in pieces, it has been calling me over and over again never letting me have a minutes peace. And I can't deny that its the most wonderful thing I've ever felt in my life. It's you who makes me feel like this." Terry smiled tenderly, putting the warmness of his love in the look he never moved away from Candys eyes, savouring every word of his confession. "My lady Freckles, my angel, Candy, I love you. So much that its beyond any description. And I always will."

Tears came into Candys eyes. When she had been running after Terry she already knew it. But hearing that she was loved from the man who was everything for her was heaven on earth. Through tears she said:

"It's true Terry. I'm here because I want to stay with you. Here is the place where I belong, it is by your side. I love you Terry. Dont ever doubt that."

He took her hands and leaned his face over hers, tracing kisses on her cheeks and eyes and drying up her tears and all worries, suspicions and doubts left in him. Then in a growing urge to feel themselves in each others arms they hugged and their voices merged in a mutual _"I love you_".

Still holding Candy in his arms Terry pulled back and said in a voice not bereft of complacency:

"This should mean your engagement to Albert is..."

"It was broken off, of course. It'd been a mistake assuring myself that it would be good to marry Albert. I was so confused. But I know it now. He has always been like brother to me, nothing more than that. I can see only you as my husband."

"Are you proposing to me Freckles?" Terry gave a mischievous smirk and Candy blushed becoming aware of what she had blurted out.

"Well then youre on the right track my love." Terry's face suddenly became serious and determined. He put his arm in his pocket to fish out the box with the ring he had bought in New York two days before and without letting go of her eyes kneeled in front of her. Candice White Andrew will you marry me please?

"Yes, Terry, yes. Yes, Ill marry you!" Candy answered impatiently, having figured out Terrys intentions before they were pronounced in verbal form and hardly letting him finish his proposal. She was struggling not to bounce on him straght away, before he had completed the ritual. Presenting Terry with her best smile Candy watched him placing the ring on her finger. She thought if there was a picture of ideal happiness in the world that should be it. In an excited voice she nearly whispered:

"It's like in my dreams."

"It's better Candy. This time its _real_." The words faded as Terrys face was on the half way to Candy's and an instant later he took possession of her lips. At first innocent and almost timid, the kiss was getting deeper, bolder for every new motion they made was refreshed by the ardor that had been suppressed for years and now was bursting out. And who knows how much embarassement would experience a random passer-by, hadnt a wise actress and experienced mother recalled to come back and close the compartments door.

Thus the vicious circle of fleeting encounters and partings, nightmares and false dawns, tears and self-reproaches was broken. Or maybe Candy and Terry hadn't been running in circles at all and it had been their own thorny path to the dream.

T H E E N D


End file.
